TWINKEE

THE FIRST TWINKEE
(by an anonymous marketing executive)

THE MORAL OF THIS FABLE IS:

IF YOU WANT TO SELL RECORDS, FIRST BUILD YOUR REPUTATION AND DEVELOP A FANBASE FOR YOUR
MUSIC. YOU DO THIS BY PERFORMING LIVE. DO IT EVERYWHERE YOU CAN. PLAY FOR FREE, PLAY FOR THE
DOOR, OR A FLAT FEE, BUT GET OUT THERE AND PLAY. ORGANIZE YOUR MUSIC BUSINESS, DRAW UP A
PLAN, AND BE READY TO WORK AND SPEND YOUR OWN MONEY TO DEVELOP IT. EVEN THOUGH YOU MIGHT
HAVE GREAT SONGS, NO COMPANY CAN AFFORD TO TAKE A CHANCE ON AN UNKNOWN PRODUCT UNLESS
YOU CAN DEMONSTRATE YOUR PRODUCT WILL SELL.
THIS IS THE PLAIN AND SIMPLE TRUTH OF THE RECORD BUSINESS THAT
NOONE WANTS TO HEAR.

GO
BACK

Joe Jones, a really dedicated and talented chef, comes to a food company with a new invention.)

Joe Jones: "Hello, my name is Joe Jones and I've just invented a great new snack food."

Food Co Rep.: "Whats it called?"

JJ: "I call it "The Twinkee". It's really delicious."

Rep: "Tell me, Mr Jones, might I sample your Twinkee?"

JJ: "Sure!" Here's one. (hands food co rep )
(Food company rep tastes the twinkee)

Rep: "Well, Mr Jones, your new product, The Twinkee, IS really delicious!"

JJ: Thanks!  I worked real hard on developing it.  I spent over $10,000 on different batter mixes, food processing equipment and a processing plant to come up with this one Twinkee."

Rep: "Well, Mr Jones, what would you like us to do?"

JJ: "I'd like you to sell it for me, and make us both a lot of money.It is really good isnt it.??"

Rep: "Yes,. Mr Jones, it is a very good product. Tell me, how many other people have you showed this to?

JJ: "Well, a few friends of mine. They tasted it and also said it was very good, and that they liked it.

Rep: "And about how many people in all know about this "Twinkee"??

JJ: "Oh, a lot of people have heard me talk about it, and a few have even tasted it and said that it was delicious.."

Rep: "And how many would you say that would be, Mr Jones?"

JJ: Oh, maybe 15-20 people so far. But hey, I've got a MYFOODSPACE page with over 1400 food-friends, and they put me on their page. They're also chefs, and they have their own stuff they make. But they really like mine, too!

Rep: "And tell me, Mr Jones, where would you like us to sell your Twinkee?"

JJ: "Oh, I was thinking of having you put it in major grocery stores and in snack food machines. It would be perfect for snack food machines. Its very fluffy and light and everyone who tastes it says its really delicious, you know.."

Rep: "Yes, Mr Jones, I believe we've already covered that point..now tell me. How much advertising of this product have you done so far?"

JJ: "Well, not very much at all.  I just figured that you could handle all that, since promoting a product is your business. I'm just a chef, you know.

Rep: "Well,  Mr Jones, in order for us to be able to put your Twinkee in retail stores and snack food machines, we're going to have to do a marketing and advertising promotion. It's going to cost a few hundred thousand dollars.

J: "OK. Well, so when can we get started?"

Rep: "Well, you see, you're going to have to supply the financing for this, Mr Jones"

JJ: "But, wait a minute...you said you really liked my Twinkee..isnt that enough to get you to put up the money??"

Rep: "Well, Mr Jones, we handle a lot of other food products here invented by chefs and cooks who have built a long-standing reputation as professionals by years and years of consistent baking and cooking. Those chefs have all proven themselves. Their products undergo extensive marketing analysis, thousands of consumer groups over a period of years have taste-tested their concoctions. Financial resources have been invested into promotion and advertising, and  even after their products get put on grocery store shelves, sometimes, many of these products just dont sell. That means we can spend a lot of money on products and still not make our initial investment back.  You have not yet established a reputation as a chef in the market place, Mr Jones. In order for us to do the advertising and promotion and distribution, we're going to need collateral from you in case your Twinkee doesn't sell."

JJ: "But you SAID you LIKED the Twinkee!"

Rep: "Well, Mr Jones, I'll tell you what we can do. If you will agree to going to a lot of different stores on a regular basis and hand out some free samples of your Twinkee, we CAN talk to our distributors and maybe get them to take a chance on your product, and even see if we can get it in stores for you."

"JJ: "Well, I'm not sure I can really do that on a regular basis..maybe once or twice a month tops. I work for a living and I have to pay my bills, you know.."

Rep: "Well, heres the problem with that, Mr Jones. You see, the people who run the grocery stores and own the snack food machines want to know that everything they put on their shelves or their machines will SELL.  Your Twinkee has no reputation as of yet, so it is going to be a bit hard to convince them to replace a product they know will sell and take up that space with your Twinkee."

JJ: "That doesnt seem fair."

Rep:"Probably not, Mr Jones...but I can almost guarantee I might be able to change your mind about that..."

JJ: "How could you possibly do that?"

Rep:"If you were the one that owned those grocery stores or snack food machines, Mr Jones, you'd understand. You see, whether or not I personally like your Twinkee, there are thousands of other chefs out there with products very much like yours who all want to get their snack foods in stores and in snack food machines. And it just so happens that many of them have excellent snack food products, but still, many of them will never see their snacks in those grocery stores or snack food machines"

JJ: "Why not"?

Rep: "Because hardly anyone has tasted their products. All the chefs want to do is create, but hardly any of them are willing to give away free samples of their products so that other people can try them. The grocery stores and snack food machine companies only want products on their shelves that they know will sell.  You see, awhile back, some chefs decided they would try and circumvent the system and spent a lot of money manufacturing their own snack foods. Every once in awhile, they will sell one or two or even a few on their own. But in the end, they will have spent far more money making those snacks than they will ever make back because almost noone knows they exist.

JJ: " So tell me, HOW do I get people to know my snack food exists?"

Rep: "Simple, Mr. Jones. Just go out there and hand out a free sample to everyone you meet. Eventually, if you hand out enough free samples, there is a really good chance you'll be getting a phone call from me."

JJ: "Why?"

Rep: "Because every grocery store chain and snack food machine distributor will be calling me, asking me where they can get their hands on one..."